In solitude, I was lost in the thoughts of my existence, and I asked myself. "What am l? Where have I come from? Where is the unseen world into which I disappear every day'? What does it mean to become ghaib (unseen)? How docs ghaib become zahir (seen) and zahir return to ghaib? What is the mechanism behind this process?"
It is 'His Highness' who is aware of the secret of creation; I am not.
"Where was I before my birth, and bow was I manifested here into this
world?" When I arrived into this world, the body which is destined to
appear from the unseen and disappear into it, began to grow. The growth
was such that, when the first day of an infant disappeared, it brought forth the second day. When the second day advanced towards its origin, the third day displayed itself. The infant, climbing on to the stairs of the seen and unseen, arrives back at the junction from where its journey began, and finally vanishes into the unseen world again, That is, the child existed in the unseen world before its arrival into this world, and after manifestation, it disappears once more into the unseen world. The child has no knowledge of when this entire process begins, nor does it know when it will end.
All of sudden, a wave of energy lifted the veils over my mind, and an image displayed before me. The moment I saw it, I realised that it was not a lone image. There were hordes of images placed one after the other. Eventually, all those images fell apart Some of them slept in their graves, and others settled upon thrones in grand palaces.
"And We reveal the book unto thee as an exposition of all things. and a guidance and a mercy and good tidings for those who have surrendered." (Quran. 16:89)
A Spiritual Order is an institute that imparts the knowledge of ghaib-o-shaood (The unseen and the seen) and introduces one to happiness. When one enrolls, at first, they are overwhelmed by doubt and hopelessness. This is because Satan's mission is to make people unhappy. He exploits their ego in order to achieve his goal Consequently, people shrink into the shell of their ego and begin to think of themselves as different to who they truly are. They assume that the little effort they make in the way of God is a huge feat. This weakness drives them into thinking that they deserve so much more and in doing so, they disregard innumerable blessings that God has bestowed upon them.
Once, a wealthy man complained that his friend who had prayed for his father's longevity, had turned away from God because his prayers were not accepted. His friend had spent a huge sum of money to treat his father's ailments, but nothing that he did could save his father's life.
I told him tha1 before anything, his friend's prayer was impractical. "Death and birth are absolute and they are bound to happen. One is rendered helpless before them. How much has your friend paid God for the land he has built his house upon? What would he have done were be born poor or paralysed?"
Dear readers, women and men! Your soul is beautiful, and your mind is brilliant. This brilliance and beauty is not our own accomplishment, rather they are gifts from God, who is the best of all creators.
Hopelessness and upsetting thoughts are part and parcel of this path. During the journey, a wayfarer faces storms, dust and exhaustion. However, a sincere traveler keeps walking on the path even when the destination is beyond their sight. Their sole objective is to reach the destination and hence they remain steadfast in their pursuit of it. As it is a given that all wayfarers face regressive thoughts on the path of spirituality, 1 have the utmost faith that you will get through it successfully.
You have accepted me as your teacher and I have made you the light of my eyes. It is my responsibility to continually tell you of the labyrinths on this path and it is obligatory upon you to not accept anything transitory, be it big or small, other than the destination on this path. When one arrives at the destination, everything bows before them.
The friends of God are those who are happy. This is why, when your happy face appears sad in my vision, it makes me restless. Do you understand this point?
You and I both have nobody in this world. Someone will leave us, as we will leave many people behind. Our last asset will simply be a two yard grave, and even tha1 is subjective to availability. In the grave, our body becomes the source of food for insects; our ego transmutes into clay particles. and those particles are then trampled upon by men, cats, dogs, donkeys, buffaloes and other creatures. The crowns and heads of the great kings and the likes of Nimrod, Pharoah, Shaddad, and Korah, have been swallowed by the earth. All of them have transformed into clay particles. Today, we all walk upon them.
The trustee of the knowledge of the unseen world. Huzoor Qalandar Baba Auliya (RA) states,
"Man takes a step on the path of God and God forbid; they assume that they have done God a great favour. Why do they nor think on how God not only provided them with nourishment in the womb of their mothers, but also arranged food for them during the first 2.15 years of childhood, without making them undergo any form of hardship. God did not charge His creatures a single penny for the oxygen, water and other resources He has provided. He blessed them with the love of a mother and compassion of a father. He bestowed them with kin, honour and health. He also gave them wisdom in order to spend their lives. On average, a person enjoys a life span of about 70 to 80 years. However, despite this short-lived life, they boastfully roam upon the earth created by God. They rebel and assign values to the resources He has given them. Despite all of this, God remembers them at every step of their life."
I am narrating this account from a time where I was undergoing spiritual training. Back then, my life was a haven for doubt and apprehensions. When I stepped on to the path of belief, I was attacked right, left and center by doubts and disbelief. I would often wonder why my prayers to God had been left unanswered over the years. Why was my inner vision not activated despite all the night vigils l performed? I thought I had rights over my spiritual teacher as I had spent days and nights in his service. I wondered why I was kept deprived while others were blessed. When things went beyond control and Satan made me his weapon, I lost all hope.
One day, my kind spiritual teacher addressed me, "Khwaja Sahib, sit down."
As I sat down, be asked, "How am I related to you?"
I answered, "I am your servant."
He said, "Alright, but who am l to you?"
I hesitantly said, "Sir, you are my beloved,"
He smiled and said, "The matter is solved in this case. Now tell me, when one sits next to their beloved, does any other thought strike them? If it does, it is an act of disrespect to the beloved. If you are with your loved one, and in the midst of it some other thought surfaces in your mind, it means that the thought which comes to your mind is actually your beloved. How am I your beloved then, if what you really want is to see paradise and fly into the heavens? In this case, paradise, and your desire to fly and wonderwork are your beloved."
What I heard shook me. My eyes welled up, and my heart was burdened with remorse, I stood up, and with heavy steps walked towards my master; I kept my head upon his feet. He took a deep sigh, and held me in an embrace.
The pleasure of the union with my beloved is still fresh in my memory, and keeps me restless through night and day. Where have I not travelled to seek that pleasure? I visited every nook and comer of paradise, witnessed the beauty in the wings of the angels, in the heights of the heavens, and in the reflection of light in the heavenly bodies of archangels. I roamed around in the strata of hell, and also struggled with death. I saw things that cannot be explained in words, but the pleasure that T found in the union with my dear spiritual master, was not in those sights.
After dying in each moment, I live with the hope that I will seek his nearness. After living every moment, 1 die in anticipation for the union with my master. When I look within, I see him, and when 1 look without, I see his reflection,
Ah! Even after so many years, the pleasure that was in that union, has left my soul yearning. There is restlessness. There is anticipation. I live with this belief, die with this faith and will rise again with this conviction that my dear spiritual master will embrace me again in such a way that I will annihilate within him. Nobody will recognise that the master and disciple are two different layers.
May God protect you.
Sep 2020 - QSM
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