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Question: I
am a 20-year-old BA student, and for the past five years, I have been suffering
from a tormenting affliction: whenever I try to bring a virtuous thought to my
mind, involuntarily, a harmful thought follows immediately. I have sincere
faith in Allah and His Messenger (P.B.U.H), but whenever I think of Allah or
His Messenger (P.B.U.H), these thoughts tragically shift from purity to
negativity. Despite my continuous repentance and seeking forgiveness, I am often
overwhelmed with despair. At times, I wake up in the middle of the night,
weeping, and beseeching Allah to rid me of this affliction. I am unable to
express certain details due to the fear of committing irreverence, but these
persistent thoughts lead me to consider actions like suicide, though I am fully
aware that such acts only bring torment in this life and the Hereafter.
When
I see others offering prayers, I am consumed by uncontrollable tears, feeling
deeply unfortunate because I cannot experience the same. In gatherings where
the remembrance of Allah or the Prophet (P.B.U.H) is recited, profane and
disgraceful thoughts flood my mind, making me feel exposed and vulnerable. I
resort to self-harm and weep, yet this torment persists. I am unsure where to
seek refuge or what remedy could alleviate this suffering.
As
a child, I was exposed to undesirable books and magazines brought into our home
by my uncle, who had a keen interest in them. On one occasion, my mother caught
me reading such material, and though she reprimanded me, I secretly continued
to indulge my curiosity. Over time, this indulgence became a source of internal
conflict, causing confusion and mental distress. I regret not heeding my
mother's warnings. Now, this affliction has become a permanent part of my life,
compelling me to withdraw from religious gatherings. Even when I hear the
recitation of the Qur'an, I leave because I fear I may be committing
irreverence.
For
the last two years, I have been residing in the Middle East with my parents,
and people often remark on my fortune, as I have easy access to visit sacred
sites. Yet, each time I hear this, I feel deep sorrow, as despite being
physically near these places, I feel spiritually distant. I am currently in
Pakistan.
Answer:
The reading of morally detrimental novels, stories, and magazines can cause
profound emotional turmoil, leading to a disintegration of societal and
religious values. When these values disintegrate, individuals often become
ensnared in conflicting thoughts, which ultimately distort their beliefs. These
involuntary thoughts about Allah, the Prophet (P.B.U.H), and religion are not
deliberate but stem from a fractured belief system and the inner guilt
associated with it. This results in a latent, a festering abscess that deeply
disturbs the soul. This condition often causes a psychological affliction that,
though invisible, can be more painful than any physical ailment. May Allah, in
His mercy, protect us from such suffering.
To
remedy this distressing situation, it is recommended to sew a shirt(kurta) made
from coarse, unbleached khaddar (a rough cotton fabric), ensuring it is one
inch larger than the body, both in sleeve length and body width, and extending
to the ankles. This garment should be worn in a dark room—if there is no
darkness, create it by turning off all lights. Once dressed, the individual
should walk around for 15 minutes, continuously reciting the following verses:
"Alhamdulillahi Rabbil Alamin, Ar-Rahman
Ar-Rahim, Malik Yawmid-Din."
ٱلۡحَمۡدُ لِلَّهِ رَبِّ ٱلۡعَٰلَمِينَ ١ ٱلرَّحۡمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ ٢ مَٰلِكِ يَوۡمِ ٱلدِّينِ ٣
After 15 minutes, the shirt should be removed and folded, placing it in a safe, concealed area within the same room. This practice should be continued until the individual's beliefs are purified and their thoughts are realigned with divine guidance. It is crucial that the room remain dark throughout the duration of this ritual. This process addresses the purification of both belief and thoughts and is designed to alleviate the inner turmoil.
Khwaja Shamsuddin Azeemi
Nearly three decades ago, the esteemed spiritual scholar and blessed guide, Khwaja Shamsuddin Azeemi (R.A), inaugurated a mission of public service with the objective of liberating humanity from afflictions, psychological distress, and physical ailments. For ten years, he remained in contemplative retreat, silently advancing this sacred commitment to the service of creation (khidmat-e-khalq). As the hearts of the people began turning toward him, he employed the medium of mass communication. In 1969, this initiative was formally introduced to the public through newspapers and spiritual journals. According to conservative estimates, through written correspondence and face-to-face interaction—particularly via national publications and the Roohani Digest—Hazrat Azeemi has extended spiritual guidance and healing to over 1.4 million men and women, addressing intricate personal crises and intractable medical conditions. Today, it is not uncommon that wherever a few individuals gather, and a seemingly insoluble dilemma or incurable illness is mentioned, someone inevitably suggests: “Establish contact with Azeemi Sahib—the matter will be resolved.”
Through the grace of Allah the Almighty, the spiritual affinity with the Prophet (P.B.U.H), and the continued beneficence of the blessed guide, four volumes of Roohani Daak (Spiritual Correspondence) have now been compiled. The first volume is hereby presented to you for contemplation and benefit.
